The Dangers of Quicksand
GenX has been right all along!
When I was a kid, growing up as part of Generation X, there was one irrational fear that seemed to dominate playground conversations: QUICKSAND!
The idea that at any moment we could be swallowed whole by an unsuspecting patch of sand or mulch was terrifying. I remember vividly imagining the scene—one hand desperately reaching heavenward as our friends tried like hell to get us unstuck. The grownups didn’t even seem to care or notice that this danger lurked everywhere!
As it turned out, quicksand was not something I needed to spend so much mental attention and energy on. At least not on the playground.
The real danger of quicksand wasn’t in the playground, but in the mind. Getting stuck—mentally, physically, and emotionally—would prove to be super problematic as an adult. It’s the quicksand of the mind that has truly tested me.
Let me paint you a picture…
For a couple of years now, I've been grappling with a stubborn physical issue. Despite seeking help here and there, I haven’t been a strong advocate on my own behalf. As a risk taker, boundary pusher, and overall courageous badass, my paralysis on this issue baffled me. But not immediately understanding it was my first misstep—into a pit of quicksand.
As kids we were super clear on the fact that struggling only made you sink faster. So, metaphorically, I stood still in the quicksand, thinking that was the best course of action. But standing still wasn’t enough—I was sinking slowly... but surely.
Then, something remarkable happened. A friend asked me a question. Her words sliced through the fog that had enveloped my mind. I started to answer her, slowly at first, but then everything poured out in a torrent of emotion and revelation. My face flushed with shame, and sweat dotted my forehead. “Why was that so difficult?” I asked myself, astounded by my own reaction.
But that moment was a turning point. Her question was the stick we used as kids to rescue each other from the quicksand. It was my lifeline.
The very next day, empowered by that question, I sprang into action. I found a resource, made an appointment, asked questions, and began the process of advocating for myself. My friend had thrown me a lifeline, and I grabbed it with both hands, refusing to let go until I was free, standing once again on solid ground.
That question—simple yet profound—had the power to get me “unstuck”.
As I reflect on this seemingly small yet monumental moment, I realize that this is what I love about coaching. When you’re stuck, sometimes all it takes is one insightful question to start the process of getting unstuck. You might not resolve everything immediately (just like my issue), but you find yourself on solid ground, ready to make decisions about what comes next.
So, the next time you feel stuck, find a coach. A coach with a good stick question is probably even better.
Sometimes all it takes is one powerful question to pull you out of the quicksand of the mind and set you on the path to freedom. Don’t be afraid to reach out and grab that lifeline.
Until next time…watch your step!
Leah